Lies are more hurtful than anything.
There’s no need to lie, a relationship with honesty is one that will stay.
Not only for a partnership but also our relationships with our children. When my daughter speaks of her father I find it very hard to tell her the truth without hurting her.
She’s 7 now, she isn’t silly and she’s now understanding how her father works. Things he does or says and the way he uses his relationship with her to get one up on me but if she realises now then there’s no doubt she’ll not want anything to do with him sooner rather than later.
For all he did I could have stopped him from seeing her and been quite within my rights but instead I’m careful, I ensure she knows she can tell me anything and I trust that he looks after her. I won’t run the risk that as she grows older she can blame me for not seeing him or missed out on a relationship with him.
It’s harsh but when she’s old enough and if she ever asks, I won’t lie to her. I won’t give her all the horrid details but I’ll be honest with her and she can make her own judgement and decision. I will ofcourse explain that it was all in the past and that I put a stop to it all for her and thats where it was left but I won’t allow him to make me lie to my own daughter whom I’ll raise never to lie to me. If he doesn’t want her knowing he shouldn’t have done what he did.